Habit 7 - Sharpen The Saw

Sharpen the Saw means preserving and enhancing the greatest asset you have--you. It means having a balanced program for self-renewal in the four areas of your life: physical, social/emotional, mental, and spiritual. Here are some examples of activities:

• Physical: Beneficial eating, exercising, and resting
• Social/Emotional: Making social and meaningful connections with others
• Mental: Learning, reading, writing, and teaching
• Spiritual: Spending time in nature, expanding spiritual self through meditation, music, art, prayer, or service

As you renew yourself in each of the four areas, you create growth and change in your life. Sharpen the Saw keeps you fresh so you can continue to practice the other six habits. You increase your capacity to produce and handle the challenges around you. Without this renewal, the body becomes weak, the mind mechanical, the emotions raw, the spirit insensitive, and the person selfish. Not a pretty picture, is it?

Feeling good doesn't just happen. Living a life in balance means taking the necessary time to renew yourself. It's all up to you. You can renew yourself through relaxation. Or you can totally burn yourself out by overdoing everything. You can pamper yourself mentally and spiritually. Or you can go through life oblivious to your well-being. You can experience vibrant energy. Or you can procrastinate and miss out on the benefits of good health and exercise. You can revitalize yourself and face a new day in peace and harmony. Or you can wake up in the morning full of apathy because your get-up-and-go has got-up-and-gone. Just remember that every day provides a new opportunity for renewal--a new opportunity to recharge yourself instead of hitting the wall. All it takes is the desire, knowledge, and skill.

Habit 6 - Synergize

To put it simply, synergy means "two heads are better than one." Synergize is the habit of creative cooperation. It is teamwork, open-mindedness, and the adventure of finding new solutions to old problems. But it doesn't just happen on its own. It's a process, and through that process, people bring all their personal experience and expertise to the table. Together, they can produce far better results that they could individually. Synergy lets us discover jointly things we are much less likely to discover by ourselves. It is the idea that the whole is greater than the sum of the parts. One plus one equals three, or six, or sixty--you name it.
When people begin to interact together genuinely, and they're open to each other's influence, they begin to gain new insight. The capability of inventing new approaches is increased exponentially because of differences.
Valuing differences is what really drives synergy. Do you truly value the mental, emotional, and psychological differences among people? Or do you wish everyone would just agree with you so you could all get along? Many people mistake uniformity for unity; sameness for oneness. One word--boring! Differences should be seen as strengths, not weaknesses. They add zest to life.

Habit 5 - Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood

Communication is the most important skill in life. You spend years learning how to read and write, and years learning how to speak. But what about listening? What training have you had that enables you to listen so you really, deeply understand another human being? Probably none, right?

If you're like most people, you probably seek first to be understood; you want to get your point across. And in doing so, you may ignore the other person completely, pretend that you're listening, selectively hear only certain parts of the conversation or attentively focus on only the words being said, but miss the meaning entirely. So why does this happen? Because most people listen with the intent to reply, not to understand. You listen to yourself as you prepare in your mind what you are going to say, the questions you are going to ask, etc. You filter everything you hear through your life experiences, your frame of reference. You check what you hear against your autobiography and see how it measures up. And consequently, you decide prematurely what the other person means before he/she finishes communicating. Do any of the following sound familiar?

"Oh, I know just how you feel. I felt the same way." "I had that same thing happen to me." "Let me tell you what I did in a similar situation."

Because you so often listen autobiographically, you tend to respond in one of four ways:
Evaluating: You judge and then either agree or disagree.
Probing: You ask questions from your own frame of reference.
Advising: You give counsel, advice, and solutions to problems.
Interpreting: You analyze others' motives and behaviors based on your own experiences.

You might be saying, "Hey, now wait a minute. I'm just trying to relate to the person by drawing on my own experiences. Is that so bad?" In some situations, autobiographical responses may be appropriate, such as when another person specifically asks for help from your point of view or when there is already a very high level of trust in the relationship.

Habit 4 - Think Win-Win

Think Win-Win isn't about being nice, nor is it a quick-fix technique. It is a character-based code for human interaction and collaboration.

Most of us learn to base our self-worth on comparisons and competition. We think about succeeding in terms of someone else failing--that is, if I win, you lose; or if you win, I lose. Life becomes a zero-sum game. There is only so much pie to go around, and if you get a big piece, there is less for me; it's not fair, and I'm going to make sure you don't get anymore. We all play the game, but how much fun is it really?

Win-win sees life as a cooperative arena, not a competitive one. Win-win is a frame of mind and heart that constantly seeks mutual benefit in all human interactions. Win-win means agreements or solutions are mutually beneficial and satisfying. We both get to eat the pie, and it tastes pretty darn good!

A person or organization that approaches conflicts with a win-win attitude possesses three vital character traits:
1.Integrity: sticking with your true feelings, values, and commitments
2.Maturity: expressing your ideas and feelings with courage and consideration for the ideas and feelings of others
3.Abundance Mentality: believing there is plenty for everyone

Many people think in terms of either/or: either you're nice or you're tough. Win-win requires that you be both. It is a balancing act between courage and consideration. To go for win-win, you not only have to be empathic, but you also have to be confident. You not only have to be considerate and sensitive, you also have to be brave. To do that--to achieve that balance between courage and consideration--is the essence of real maturity and is fundamental to win-win.

Habit 3 - Put First Things First

To live a more balanced existence, you have to recognize that not doing everything that comes along is okay. There's no need to overextend yourself. All it takes is realizing that it's all right to say no when necessary and then focus on your highest priorities.

Habit 1 says, "You're in charge. You're the creator." Being proactive is about choice. Habit 2 is the first, or mental, creation. Beginning with the End in Mind is about vision. Habit 3 is the second creation, the physical creation. This habit is where Habits 1 and 2 come together. It happens day in and day out, moment-by-moment. It deals with many of the questions addressed in the field of time management. But that's not all it's about.

Habit 3 is about life management as well--your purpose, values, roles, and priorities. What are "first things?" First things are those things you, personally, find of most worth. If you put first things first, you are organizing and managing time and events according to the personal priorities you established in Habit 2.

Habit 2 - Begin With The End In Mind

 So, what do you want to be when you grow up? That question may appear a little trite, but think about it for a moment. Are you--right now--who you want to be, what you dreamed you'd be, doing what you always wanted to do? Be honest. Sometimes people find themselves achieving victories that are empty--successes that have come at the expense of things that were far more valuable to them. If your ladder is not leaning against the right wall, every step you take gets you to the wrong place faster.

Habit 2 is based on imagination--the ability to envision in your mind what you cannot at present see with your eyes. It is based on the principle that all things are created twice. There is a mental (first) creation, and a physical (second) creation. The physical creation follows the mental, just as a building follows a blueprint. If you don't make a conscious effort to visualize who you are and what you want in life, then you empower other people and circumstances to shape you and your life by default. It's about connecting again with your own uniqueness and then defining the personal, moral, and ethical guidelines within which you can most happily express and fulfill. Begin with the End in Mind means to begin each day, task, or project with a clear vision of your desired direction and destination, and then continue by flexing your proactive muscles to make things happen.

One of the best ways to incorporate Habit 2 into your life is to develop a Personal Mission Statement. It focuses on what you want to be and do. It is your plan for success. It reaffirms who you are, puts your goals in focus, and moves your ideas into the real world. Your mission statement makes you the leader of your own life. You create your own destiny and secure the future you envision.

Habit 1 - Be Proactive

Your life doesn't just "happen." Whether you know it or not, it is carefully designed by you. The choices, after all, are yours. You choose happiness. you choose sadness. you choose decisiveness. You choose ambivalence. You choose success. You choose failure. You choose courage. You choose fear. Just remember that every moment, every situation, provides a new choice. And in doing so, it gives you a perfect opportunity to do things differently to produce more positive results.

Habit 1: Be Proactive is about taking responsibility for your life. You can't keep blaming everything on your parents or grandparents. Proactive people recognize that they are "response-able." They don't blame genetics, circumstances, conditions, or conditioning for their behavior. They know they choose their behavior. Reactive people, on the other hand, are often affected by their physical environment. They find external sources to blame for their behavior. If the weather is good, they feel good. If it isn't, it affects their attitude and performance, and they blame the weather. All of these external forces act as stimuli that we respond to. Between the stimulus and the response is your greatest power--you have the freedom to choose your response. One of the most important things you choose is what you say. Your language is a good indicator of how you see yourself. A proactive person uses proactive language--I can, I will, I prefer, etc. A reactive person uses reactive language--I can't, I have to, if only. Reactive people believe they are not responsible for what they say and do--they have no choice.

Instead of reacting to or worrying about conditions over which they have little or no control, proactive people focus their time and energy on things they can control. The problems, challenges, and opportunities we face fall into two areas--Circle of Concern and Circle of Influence.

Proactive people focus their efforts on their Circle of Influence. They work on the things they can do something about: health, children, problems at work. Reactive people focus their efforts in the Circle of Concern--things over which they have little or no control: the national debt, terrorism, the weather. Gaining an awareness of the areas in which we expend our energies in is a giant step in becoming proactive.

Seek First To Understand, Then Be Understood.

THE SEVEN HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PEOPLE
Habit 5 -- Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood
Principles of Empathic Communication
Character and Communication

Communication is the most important skill in life
If you want to interact effectively with me, to influence me, you first need to understand me.
You have to build the skills of empathic listening on a base of character that inspires openness and trust.

Empathic Listening
Most people listen with the intent to reply.
When another person speaks, we are usually 'listening' at one of four levels:

• ignoring  
• pretending  
• selective listening  
• attentive listening

 Very few of us ever practice the highest form of listening -- empathic listening.

 Only 10 percent of our communication is represented by the words we say, another 30 percent by our sounds, and 60 percent by body language.  

Empathic listening is risky.

Diagnose Before You Prescribe

Diagnose before you prescribe is a correct principle in many areas of life.
It is the mark of all true professionals
The amateur salesman sells products, the professional salesman sells solutions to needs and problems.

Four Autobiographical Responses
Because we listen autobiographically (from the perspective of our own paradigms), we tend to respond in one of four ways:

• We evaluate  
• We probe  
• We advise 
• We interpret 

The language of logic is different from the language of sentiment and emotion.
As long as responses are logical, we are at liberty to ask questions and give counsel. The moment responses become emotional, empathic listening is necessary.

Empathic listening involves four developmental stages:

•  mimic content  
• ephrase the content 
• reflect feeling  
• rephrase the content and reflect the feeling 

Empathic listening enables us to turn transactional opportunities into transformational opportunities. 
The key to empathic listening is to genuinely seek the welfare of the individual to whom you are listening.

Understanding and Perception

As you learn to listen deeply to other people, you will discover tremendous differences in perception.
Habit 5 is the first step in the process of Win/Win. 
Then Seek to Be Understood
Knowing how to be understood is the other half of Habit 5 and is crucial in reaching Win/Win solutions. 
The essence of making effective presentations: 
Ethos -- your personal credibility. 
Pathos -- the empathic side.
Logos -- the logic. 
When you can present your own ideas clearly, specifically, visually and in the context of the paradigms of your audience, you significantly increase the credibility of your ideas.

One on One
Habit 5 is right in the middle of your circle of influence. You can always seek first to understand. 
Spend time with your spouse and children, one on one.

HAPPINESS

There are times in our lives where things may not seem happy or joyous at all. Events happen and steal our joy. How do you recover from this? Where are you getting your joy? I must confess, life is not all roses. One of my six year-old daughter's favorite sayings is, "It's not fair". She is learning that life isn't fair at times.

What would life be like if we had everything we wanted? King Solomon in the Bible had it all: power, fame, fortune, and wisdom. Yet, he put his happiness in temporal things and became very unhappy. Have you ever said to yourself, I will be really happy when I get that new car? How long does this happiness last? Or what about an accomplishment you have achieved. The next one must be bigger and better. It's never enough and the cycle continues, searching for the happiness "high" that you experienced before.

What makes you happy? I'm not just talking about for a few hours or days. I'm talking about happiness for a while longer.

Here are four suggestions on living a happier life:

1. Think of the small things that make you happy and write them down. This could be a sunny day, the smell of freshly cut grass, or hearing your favorite song on the radio.
2. Keep everything in perspective. Put things in their proper place. If something makes you unhappy, consider the scenario in the big scheme of things. Will it really matter when you are 80 years old?
3. Look at the root cause of what makes you happy in your life. Remember what gives you joy.
4. Put yourself second and serve others, which is contradictory to what the world says. Happiness in serving another person first, rather than ourselves, is a humbling experience that shows others that they matter more than us.

Have you heard of the saying, "Giving the shirt off of your back"? Happiness is a great feeling. The wonderful thing about being happy is that it can be found in small packages. Why not take time to look for the small stuff that makes you happy today?

A Creed To Live By

Don't undermine your worth by comparing yourself with others,
It is because we are different that each of us is special.
Don't set your goals by what other people deem important,
Only you know what is best for you.
Don't take for granted the things closest to your heart
Cling to that as you would your life, for without them life is meaningless.
Don't let your life slip through your fingers by living in the past or the future.
By living your life one day at a time, you live all the days of your life.
Don't give up when you still have something to give
Nothing is really over … until the moment you stop trying.
Don't be afraid to admit that you are less than perfect,
It is the fragile thread that binds us to each other.
Don't be afraid to encounter risks,
It is by taking chances that we learn how to be brave.
Don't shut love out of your life by saying it's impossible to find.
The quickest way to receive love is to give love.
The fastest way to lose love is to hold on too tightly,
And the best way to keep love is to give it wings.
Don't dismiss your Dreams. To be without dreams is to be without hope.
To be without hope is to be without purpose.
Don't run through life so fast that you forget where you've been,
But also know where you're going.
Life is not a race, but a journey to be savored every step of the way.

Author Unknown

The Next Step (poem by Alison Wilson)

The first step needs action to start it,

The last requires patience to end,

So we question, which one's most important,

When we realize our dreams' our best friend.

Well, the answer is neither, they're equal,

But the one that will help you win through

And connect what you start to the finish,

Is the next step that's waiting for you.


Life's dreamers are great Goal Achievers!

Their faith and persistence just blends

Into one awesome cocktail of knowledge,

That whatever they want they can get.

You see, they never visualize failure,

It's success that they see shining through.

It's essential to start and to finish,

But the next step is what you must do.


Alison Wilson

Motivational Poem

Just One
One song can spark a moment,
One flower can wake the dream
One tree can start a forest,
One bird can herald spring.
One smile begins a friendship,
One handclasp lifts a soul.
One star can guide a ship at sea,
One word can frame the goal
One vote can change a nation,
One sunbeam lights a room
One candle wipes out darkness,
One laugh will conquer gloom.
One step must start each journey.
One word must start each prayer.
One hope will raise our spirits,
One touch can show you care.
One voice can speak with wisdom,
One heart can know what's true,
One life can make a difference,
You see, it's up to you!

Tips for Success in your Network Marketing Business

There are 5 key steps in the network marketing opportunity that I am involved with and I believe that these would stand you in good stead with most, if not all, network marketing type opportunities:

1. Self Development (Books, DVD's, CD's etc) - this can be described as the understanding phase
2. Work with / Be Teachable (listen/learn from those who are successful in the business) - this fuels your belief that it works.
3. Retail the products - this takes commitment.
4. Introduce others (sponsor and build your team) - take the correct action and lead by example.
5. Build for & attend events (training meetings/conferences etc) - this produces results as it keeps the motivation and skills levels high.

Other Tips

• Have personal targets and know what it takes to get there.
• If you never learn the things you don't know, you can never grow.
• The book you don't read cannot help you.
• Learn to apply what you know, so that you can ATTRACT what you want. (Law of Attraction)
• If you do NOTHING you will attract what you don't want!
• All you need to do is become more effective in applying the system (see 5 points above!)
• Your future is in YOUR hands..if you want your future in someone else's hands..get a job!
• The only lid you have is the lid you put on yourself..and your dreams.
• Time - we can: Waste it, Kill it, Spend it..or Invest it. Invest time on yourself and your business...use YOUR time wisely.
•  Comfort NEVER produces greatness...so take a step outside of your comfort zone and see the results!
• Keep reminding yourself WHY you joined the business in the first place. What is it you want? What do you want to achieve? What steps do you need to achieve what you want? If you don't take them, no-one will do it for you.
• Continually move forward and make progress towards your goals.
• Goals produce PASSION!
• Most people procrastinate...it takes 21 days to create a new habit. You need to be disciplined to make it work. Don't QUIT!
• Use an 'anchoring' technique - attach a strong reason why to your goals (eg your kids/wife/family etc).
• Commitment and Determination are NOT a skill...they are an ATTITUDE!
• Have the right attitude and you are half way there.